Conan The Librarian wrote:
wrote:

[acid]

Immaterial. I would move mountains to keep my kids from it.

This is honestly not intended as a flame, but do you really think
that you have the power to "keep your kids from" acid, pot, alcohol
or anything else you deem potentially harmful?

I believe parents have the power to help them think twice about doing
something.

Now maybe I misread your statements in this thread, but given my
experience with kids, the more you try to isolate or "protect" them
from these sorts of things, the more they will seek them out.

I don't think this is necessarily true. Disallowing a 16-year-old from
going to a party when the parent believes there is not adequate
supervision (in my case, if my wife or I didn't know the parent(s)
personally, the kids didn't go) will keep them from using alcohol or
drugs *at that party, on that night*. As parents, my wife and I made it
a habit to periodically show up at places when our kids were out. We
didn't do this all the time, but just enough to keep them on their toes.
The fact that we *might* show up at someone's house or at the
library/school/etc. was enough incentive to keep them on the straight
and narrow most of the time.

On the other hand, if you rationally discuss these substances with
them, and show them that you have some real-world knowledge about
their potential dangers (rather than the usual "just say no"
foolishness), you stand a better chance of getting through to them.

IMO, discussing is okay to a certain point. With kids, actions speak
louder than words.

Kids will make mistakes. As parents, we can't prevent that, but we
can educate them to hopefully help them make better choices in the
first place.

More can be done than that, but it takes a lot of effort and personal
involvement in the kids' lives. Showing up at all their activities and
cheering them on at sporting events does wonders. When I went to my
son's cross-country meets, there was a core group of five parents that
showed up to support the 50 or so kids participating. Many of the other
kids started calling my wife and I "Mom" and "Dad" Johnson. How sad is
that?

And IMHO, the worst thing we can do is advocate the "Just say no"
mentality. It's irrational, condescending and ultimately
counter-productive.

I found that "just say no" thing, and really ALL the anti-drug
campaigns, to be next to useless. It's a lot of good money poured down a
black hole to make the people propagating the programs feel better about
themselves.

All of the above, just IMHO.
--
TL,
Tim
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http://css.sbcma.com/timj