"Wolfgang" wrote

Wolfgang
who, it must be admitted, doesn't find human intercourse invariably and
inevitably repulsive.


There are many variations on the human intercourse theme.

Friday I went with my kid to his chosen University to see the campus, for my
first time, he's been there for some summer programs several times. We sat
in on a seminar style class in International Studies, one of his majors to
be. The subject was borders and ethics, the how and why, good and bad of
borders, both international and private property.

It was very lively and spirited. There was disagreement and debate that
was so stimulating I was ready to sign up for college again myself, one
forgets how exciting really thinking can be. Not all differences were
settled, or even definitions agreed upon, etc, but progress was made in that
direction. And there was never a split second of disrespect or attempt to
"win" the conversation ... everyone wanted to really understand the others
....... everyone seemed aware that they themselves just might be in error
or, more likely, that "truth," in the end, would be a blending of differing
ideas from differing backgrounds.

Real conversation ( my definition ) is an effort to communicate, exchange
ideas, UNDERSTAND the others involved, even if you still disagree with them.
Such human intercourse is invariably and inevitably exciting and productive,
even though it can be a bumpy trip.

On the other hand, "listening" only for something to reply to, understood
or not, to continue the fight and hopefully "score points" can be
entertaining for brief periods that might otherwise be too dull to endure.
But, such argument for the sake of argument, imo, barely qualifies as human
interaction, since it essentially requires avoiding really listening and
trying to respect or understand the other humans involved .... there is no
real interaction of ideas, just intensely worded and escalating separation
and alienation.

This latter, very common, style isn't "inevitably repulsive" but it is
rather boring.... ie. it 'gets old'