On Tue, 20 Dec 2005 00:28:02 GMT, rw
wrote:

- A German inventor had the idea of placing a specially adapted mobile
phone in the coffins of the dead. That way relatives could call up and
speak to their dear departed without having to leave home.

- The northern English city of Carlisle had second thoughts about an art
project in which the text of an ancient local curse was set on a stone
in the city centre. Not long after it was installed the city suffered
disastrous floods, a bout of cattle disease and local factory closures.

- Workers in a German post office thought they had a bomb on their hands
when a parcel began vibrating and making strange noises. It turned out
to contain an inflatable sex toy.

- A pastor in Denmark's established church who had been suspended
because he did not believe in God was allowed back into the fold. "We're
giving him another chance," said the religious affairs minister, who
oversees the Lutheran Protestant Church.

_Denmark -- what the hell, close enough to Germany._ :-)

- A mute young man who was found wandering on a southern English beach,
and who was reported to be a virtuoso piano player, had media around the
world fascinated for months. He was later found to be a German
fame-seeker -- and it turned out he didn't play the piano all that well
either.

_Both German and English! Outstanding!_

- A top official with the tennis tournament at
Wimbledon, England took the opportunity of his retirement speech to
complain about vocal grunting by female players, which he said was
getting ever louder.

- The German interior ministry said that people being snapped for ID
photographs should no longer smile because it messed up their biometric
recognition technology.

_Absolutely Perfect_

All the above was stolen from Yahoo.

Kinda weak, there, Stevie...there's nothing about Nazi homos in leather
lederhosen, biker caps, and engineer's boots waving giant buttplugs
around whilst gooseswishing up to bonfires with armloads of effeminate
rotten-toothed English Jews in public school ties while Klaus Tennstedt
conducting the London Philharmonic doing selections from Wagner blares
over a tinny PA system...you know, sorta like a Ketchum, Jr. Tuesday
night...

....and someone who lives part-time in Idaho via California who named
himself after a bunch of feathers might wish to think twi...oh,
yeah....nevermind...