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Old January 20th, 2004, 05:30 PM
Tim J.
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Default Are there any trout in Texas


"Paul Goodwin" wrote...

I just got this from a friend who is from Texas:

How do you tell the difference between Democrats, Republicans and
Southerners?

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children.
Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the corner,
raises the knife, and charges at you. You are carrying a Glock .40, and you
are an expert
shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?

Democrat's Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!

Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away? What does my wife think? What about the kids?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his
hand?
What does the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have an
appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this
send to society and to my children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he
was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier,
healthier street that would discourage
such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends [ROFF?]
for a few days and try to come to a consensus.

Republican's Answer:
BANG!


Well, I know that would be my response, anyway. And it wouldn't necessarily have
to be a knife - someone running at me with a raised seven iron would qualify.


Good luck, Paul. I enjoyed my several visits to Austin, so hopefully you will,
too.
--
TL,
Tim
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