lid wrote:

However, they still can look at pictures. Gawd, but they put some
dumb (and unPhotoshopped) ones in there. Hello? The graveyard is of
interest only to genealogists, folks. If you're going to take a pic
of a fountain pool, don't do it in winter, when it's ugly dry and all
the plants in and around it are dead and the weeds between the
flagstones are looking as if they spent the summer thriving more than
the deliberately planted (I assume) stuff. Some nicer ones later, but
still all in autumn and the deciduous trees look anemic or disease
stricken. As well as the sun spot of violet that wasn't removed from
the one of a little pond. And I don't think either the chicory /
rhubarb or the wild iris looking stuff is all that interesting or rare
that a gardener or herbalist is going to be dying to see it. Don't
show the electric or phone line right across the building. Looks
tacky. Take more pics or edit it out.

Admit that there's nothing there but fish and scenery. Don't try to
hype up much traveled people with a couple of events, one of which is
an agricultural show. Don't puff up your very few minorly famous
people. Leave that to a little guide leaflet giveaway in the lobby
or in each room / suite. If you have friggin' nothing, make lemonade.
Emphasize the quiet, the smallness and peace of the town, the
surrounding scenery, the tranquility, and the ability to sit and soak
in the sunshine.

And what is that crap about how they don't wash dishes? If you serve
meals, you retrieve the serving stuff and wash it yourself. Or risk
giving food poisoning the next guests. If it's a housekeeping room or
suite, then it's expected that the guests will do their own and
suffer the results (if careless). Any serving ware that is provided
the guests should start out sparkling, so they have to be done, even
if clean looking, after the housekeeping guests leave.

Mention the liquid refreshments part. If booze or wine / beer is not
sold to the guests, it's a good idea to let them know that, so anyone
who wants it can stock up before arrival.

And, for heavens sake, show some of the fish caught there. By guests,
by locals, by getting caught in the weir, or whatever. Name the
species. Give the weight.

Is this place run by a couple named Basil and Sybil? :-)