Not THE Joe Smith

Joe Smith wrote:

You're making this far too hard. Someone googled up a list of Wolfie's
canned phrases the other day. Randomly pick one, toss in generic
insults, call people liars and you can pass any Wolfgang Turing test.


I'm talking about a fully automated system, Joe. No human interaction or
supervision at all. Here's the algorithm in broad-brush strokes:

1. Generate new identity.

2. Alert subscribers about updates to killfiles.

3. Post innocuous item on ROFF.

4. Wait for a response from Wolfgang.

5. Parse response.

6. Is he quitting? If yes, post snide comment and go to 1.

7. Generate and post reply, referring to context-free syntax generator
and Wolfgangism database.

8. Go to 4.

--
Cut "to the chase" for my email address.

rw wrote:

Joe Smith wrote:


You're making this far too hard. Someone googled up a list of Wolfie's
canned phrases the other day. Randomly pick one, toss in generic
insults, call people liars and you can pass any Wolfgang Turing test.


I'm talking about a fully automated system, Joe. No human interaction or
supervision at all.

I know, hence the Turing test.

"Joe Smith" wrote in message
...
Jeff Taylor wrote:

"Wolfgang" wrote in message
...


Your menu, Einstein. I try not to turn up my nose at what mine host
offers.


Perfect, and here you are...


Whereas you were compelled by forces beyond your control to strike up
this little march?


Perfectly in control, no worries... As I said, you didn't have to reply.
Try it, maybe you can now? Let's see?

Just say "I QUIT"

He's not a man of his word. He got embarrassed and started back up.
Try as he might, he can't undo the embarrassment. Everyone knows he
lost.

Yah, da bum never laid a glove on me. I.......um.....stumbled.....yeah,
dat's it......I tripped over a shoelace!

Wolfgang
who knows that, like so many other things, a greater tolerance for senseless
cruelty can be cultivated.

"Joe Smith" wrote in message
...
Jeff Taylor wrote:
Breaking News from ABCNEWS.com:

JOSEPH SMITH HAS BEEN SENTENCED TO DEATH FOR THE MURDER OF CARLIE BRUCIA

http://abcnews.go.com?CMP=EMC-1396

Wolfie would be so happy,

JT

I'm not dead yet!

I grew up in a town that had a children's library. Yep, that's right, not
just a measly corner grudgingly allocated to the brats, but a whole building
just for us. And it was mine.....all mine! It was housed in an old church;
a magnificent structure built of the native limestone quarried from a local
outcrop of the Niagara escarpment that parallels the Lake Michigan
shoreline. The vaulted ceiling looked like it reached halfway to
heaven.....exactly what those who commissioned its construction doubtless
had in mind, thinking it would make for easier access when the time came.
Little did they realize that when the time came....when the building was
rededicated to a more practical, realistic and worthy purpose.....it would
actually BE heaven.

Until the age of nine I lived about two miles from this mammoth treasure
chest and I didn't have a bicycle, so it was impractical for me to go there
after school.....but I haunted the place on weekends and in the summers.
This was in the days when a "stalker" was someone who followed deer around
in the woods.....before the term was applied to anyone who spent enough time
in a place to make others who spend a lot of time there nervous. It was the
time of the great red scare, the early days of the cold war, when everybody
was suspicious and afraid of everybody.....especially anybody whose behavior
was unusual. And the dowdy librarians of that time were preconditioned to
be suspicious of children in close proximity to their precious charges. I
guess the children's library must have been some sort of Ultima Thule to
which transgressors were banished for a time as penance for a grave sin.
Even at that tender age and absorbed as I was by the riches at my fingertips
I was always dimly aware that I was under constant surveillance and the
object of concentrated disapproval.......but I was quiet, so they let me
stay. Hm.....come to think of it, it was a time much like now. But, I
digress.

Anyway, over the course of a few years (until I was old enough to get a card
allowing me access to the mother lode.....the "MAIN LIBRARY"!!) I worked my
way more or less methodically through the shelves.....fiction, nonfiction,
it didn't matter to me.....hell, I'm not sure I knew the difference. Early
one summer, I hit the shelf containing the dinosaurs. For a period of
several weeks, I read dinosaurs, I ate dinosaurs, I breathed dinosaurs, I
dreamed dinosaurs, and I regaled (tortured?) my friends and family with
dinosaurs. I learned a lot. I learned, for example, that dinosaurs had
really tiny brains.....so small, in fact, that they weren't good for much
other than regulating bodily functions just enough to keep their owners
alive. Brains so useless, in other words, that they wouldn't be missed
much. You could cut off a dinosaurs head (so went the conventional
wisdom.....at least as it was explained to children) and it wouldn't even
know it was dead......it would just walk around for a while doing whatever
it did (well, except for eating) before. Not quite literally true, of
course, but you get the point.

Wolfgang
who knows that she doesn't but......well, that's the point.

On Thu, 16 Mar 2006 21:02:02 -0800, Joe Smith wrote:

You're making this far too hard. Someone googled up a list of Wolfie's
canned phrases the other day. Randomly pick one, toss in generic
insults, call people liars and you can pass any Wolfgang Turing test.

More like the "parakeet in the mirror test".
--
Charlie...
http://www.chocphoto.com

On Fri, 17 Mar 2006 08:01:35 -0600, "Wolfgang" wrote:


"Charlie Choc" wrote in message
.. .
On Thu, 16 Mar 2006 21:02:02 -0800, Joe Smith wrote:

You're making this far too hard. Someone googled up a list of Wolfie's
canned phrases the other day. Randomly pick one, toss in generic
insults, call people liars and you can pass any Wolfgang Turing test.

More like the "parakeet in the mirror test".

Alan Turing was a very bright guy. Were the circumstances of his all too
brief life somewhat different, he would doubtless have found you guys
hilarious. After all, he would surely have understood the implications of
his namesake test. As it is, I suppose very few people, however cerebral,
find much humor in their executioners.

Wolfgang
yeah, they'll miss it......that's the point.

Polly want a cracker?
--
Charlie...
http://www.chocphoto.com