SUSPECT NABBED IN PIRANHA ATTACK AT SMITHSONIAN -- Yes, Indeed, It Was Ed Conrad.

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BULLETIN
=====================

By Oliver Shagnasty
The Washingtan Pist

WASHINGTON, DC -- City police
today apprehended the person they
claim had placed piranha in the
Smithsonin's indoor swimming pool
earlier this week, causing former
ousted Secretary Lawrence M. Small
his precious manhood and as well
as considerable embarrassment.
The suspect was identified as one
Ed Conrad who was accompanied
by his dog, Blue.

http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...onrad&Blue.jpg

Conrad, who doesn't know his ass
from a hole in the ground, has long
thought he was smarter than the
Smithsonian "experts" but even we
all know he has a petrified brain
made of coal.
Where was this freakin' imbecile
when "real" brains were given out?
Will somebody pass me the darts?

http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...dDartboard.jpg

MORE MORE MORE

===============================================

EARLIER EXCLUSIVE
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...veTheWhale.jpg

Lawrence M. Small, former Secretary of the Smithsonian, lost
his weener this morning during a swim in the Institution's
indoor pool.

Small, who enjoys taking a dip after breakfast, was bitten
by one or more piranha which authorities say probably had
been put in the pool by one Ed Conrad.

Conrad, respected on the Internet as a leader of conserving
Cyberspace, apparently was miffed because the Smithsonian
has long denied his discoveries of petrified bones, teeth and soft
organs -- some HUMAN -- between anthracite coal veins, which
obviously destroys the facetious Theory of man's Evolution..

The photo was taken by a Paparazzi just seconds before
the piranha attack.

Mr. Small, at the hospital preparing for a penis transplant
from talk.origins moderator David Iain Greig, a donor,
said he may have to find a new line of work and admits
he has received several offers to join the carnival and
tour as a freak.
.
http://www.nurple.com/sideshow/

HOW TO PROTECT YOUR PENIS
http://www.vasectomy-information.com/humor/manual.htm

EXPLAINING THE WEENER (and other good stuff...)
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=weener

THOSE ******* PIRANHA
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Piranha

HOW LAWRENCE B. SMALL SAVED TAXPAYERS' MONEY (For Himself)
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...031801369.html
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn...031900078.html

=============================================

TRUTH VS. THE MONUMENTAL LIE OF MAN'S EVOLUTION
(Fossils -- SOME HUMAN -- Found Between Coal Veins)

http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...HumanSkull.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...sOldasCoal.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...iscoveries.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...oreFossils.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...HumanBrain.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...estResults.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/F...OldestTool.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/FOSSILS/Scorpion.jpg
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/FOSSILS/MVC-013F.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/FOSSILS/MVC-022S.JPG

===============================

The anthros, their interests SO vested
And Poor Truth, for too long molested
Their deceit and deception
Near the point of perfection
If it were MY call, they'd ALL be arrested

===============================

PETRIFIED FOSSILS STILL EMBEDDED IN SLATE

http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-002S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-003S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-006S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-007S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-009S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-010S.JPG
http://mysite.verizon.net/edconrad/N...s/MVC-012S.JPG

======================================

Ed Conrad
http://www.edconrad,com
Man as Old as Coal

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